So Much More....

I have a confession to make....I am a Beth Moore junkie! I love to hear her speak- can't really get into her books but LOVE her teachings. I mean when I turned 30 I told Rob all I wanted was to meet her and have lunch with her so I could pick her brain. It didn't happen- I was disappointed. I don't even think he really tried, but that is another story.

So, I find myself on the brink of tears whenever I sit and listen to her. All kinds of emotions and spiritual things start going off inside of me when I get the privilege to hear her speak. It takes a lot for me to really go deep with someone when they are speaking- but she makes it so easy.

This past Saturday I, along with 300,000+ women around the country, was able to attend her simulcast that went along with her new book So Long, Insecurity. She did not disappoint! There she was with her colorful flowy shirt,hair that was less than perfect, her southern sense of humor and most of all her passion and sincere love for the Father. I was happy to be there but not really sure what to expect from this time with her via satellite.

Her focus was on what a secure woman looked like. She spoke from Ephesians 4 and opened the teaching with verse 1"As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received." She spent some time reminding us all that we have been given a calling and we are so quick to allow our insecurities to hold us back from experiencing all that God has for us. She described us standing before God and watching the big screen as He played on it the life we were meant to live but didn't because we held back. This verse was the foundation for much of what she taught on. Living a life worthy of what God has called us into.

So, I diligently filled page after page after page of notes as she shared the lessons God had been teaching and revealing to her. It was good- really good. Then as we prepared to break for lunch she had us stand to pray and all of a sudden I heard the Holy Spirit begin talking to me. Like rattling things off to me I had to sit down and start writing. (It amazes me how He can say so much in a matter of seconds!)

He began to say to me that I am valuable to Him. I have value and yet I am settling for so much less than He has for me. It started off with images of ways I "reward" myself. Oh, I had a rough day, I deserve this ice cream. Oh, Rob has not measured up my impossible demands so I deserve this and so on and so on and so on. He showed me that when I reach out and snatch these immediate gratifications I am settling. I am missing out on what He really has in store for me. I deserve so much more!

He then reminded me of a dream He gave me when I was 15. A dream of myself reaching out and taking a gift for fear I would not receive one just to find later that I didn't get the entire gift because I was too impatient to wait on the gift giver. He began to remind me that I am his son- which means I am valuable and worthy of so much more than this world can ever offer me. He told me that as long as I reach out and snatch a gift up for myself I would be missing out on all that He has for me.

The cry of my heart for years has been to live the life I was meant to live. To be restored to the person God designed me to be when I was still in my mother's womb. I want to receive and experience all that He meant for me. It's hard being a princess when you live in a kingdom that is so drab compared to the Kingdom you come from but have yet to fully see.

So, as dear sweet Beth finished her prayer and prepared to send us off to our boxed lunches I realized that God had brought me to that place to give me that message. all the rest was icing but this was the main course and I LOVE that it came straight from His mouth to my heart!