How Long is Lent???

So Lent has come and gone. Easter has been celebrated and I shouldn't have to think of denying myself for another year. Instead, Lent is lingering and Easter is being lived out...daily.

My Lenten experience was messy and made me pissy and had me looking at things I would rather ignore. But I couldn't ignore them....can't ignore them. They were those areas that I have become so accustomed to in my life that I had forgotten that they were never part of the original plan. Never meant to define my life. Things I need to die to so I can live the life of freedom that Christ bought for me on Good Friday.

I have been living in a place of death and defeat over my weight for so long that I have come to believe that it would never change. That I would always be as I am today. But as I journeyed with my spiritual family through Lent and listened to what God was saying to them I was beginning to hear a familiar voice of freedom and grace calling me to try again. A call to try not to lose weight but rather to live. Live the life Jesus paid dearly for me to experience. How can I celebrate Easter on Sunday only to return to my captivity on Monday? He deserves much more thanks and I want to enjoy the gift He so generously gave.

So, the Monday after Easter I began to step into the freedom bought for me. A freedom to walk towards health and complete surrender to the Father. I am not controlled by my body and it's desires. I am learning to lean on the Holy Spirit in new ways and how to make myself vulnerable to others with an area that has been a place of shame in the past. I hesitate to write about this and I don't really plan to focus on it too much here in my blog as it seems to cheapen it somehow.....or maybe I still struggle to believe this is possible and I would hate to sound like a failure again.

But here are some highlights so far.....

• Community is a place where you can feel inspired to grow and know you won't have to do it alone!
• I actually like exercising.
• I am stronger than I thought.
• Sweat is a great motivator to me!
• Sometimes knowing that others believe in you is enough to carry you until you can believe in  yourself.
• Made to Crave is an amazing book!
• Chips and Salsa will either save or kill me!